God carried me...

I made it thru this week. God carried me just when I needed Him. Monday morning I had an early appointment with Dr. Parker to remove the cancer off my jaw. He took that off and I had to wait for the lab report to come back and sure enough he had to remove more since the cancer had spread. He took a quarter size area and all the way to the bone on my jaw. Now according to my insurance, I have to wait at least 24 hours for him to sew it up for the insurance to pay. So they "pack" the area and put an "airtight" bandage on it and sent me home. I was home by 10:00 and was working away at my desk. On Tuesday I was back at Dr. Parker's office for him to take a cancerous place off my left upper shoulder, about the size of a quarter there too, and to repair my jaw. Thank goodness he only to to go into my back once. But same thing, they had to pack it and I had to go back on Wednesday for repair. On Tuesday though I had to take a sick day. The pain was bad from both the repair and the shoulder and I was so tired. I slept most of the day. Wednesday, I was able to go back to work. God just made sure that this was an easy week for me. Just when I felt like I couldn't make it thru, I would ask for some patience for the pain. The Dr. really did a good job on my face. It's about a 2 inch "zipper". Stitches come out on Monday. The place on my upper shoulder is about 2 and half inches long and he put in dissolvable stitches and covered it with steri strips so I don't have to change that bandage everyday like my face. He's the same doctor that did all the work on my face last year when I had the two places removed and people tell me all the time that you can't see it. So I'm hoping that you won't be able to see this after a few months. I won't be the most attractive for Christmas pictures but I'm alive and we are still catching this cancer before it grows. I wished they could cut into my lung and liver and bones and remove it all as easily. Radiation was put on hold this week since I had open wounds and the doctors didn't want the chance of any infections setting in. I start that back up on Monday.

I've got to finish shopping for Christmas. I mean seriously! I need a few elves to come to my home and get all this done. I just can't believe I haven't finished. Like I don't know that Christmas is always December 25th every year. Seriously! I've turned into one of those people! Now to get it done!

Santa, in case you are reading this blog. I can't say that I've been an extremely good girl this year but I've been as good as I can be. Seriously!

This time of Year....

This time of year, used to be my favorite time of the year. My boy's faces would light up with the prospect of seeing Santa and the look of Christmas lights and our house was alive with music and laughter and then the unthinkable happened we experienced the death of a child. Our 8 month old daughter Taylor died, that first Christmas, we couldn't even stand to stay home, so we loaded up a Uhaul with gifts and headed to New Mexico to spend it in a different environment so we didn't have to experience it at home. From that Christmas on it was never the same for me. Oh, I put on the "face" but it never was the same for me. My marriage starting falling apart, I was falling apart emotionally and I just never really found the joy of Christmas anymore. After the divorce, my ex and I shared the boys for Christmas and I usually found myself giving Eddy that day with the boys due to the fact I didn't really care if I was alone, I wanted to make sure that the boys had a good day and I knew his family always celebrated in a big way. I still find it hard to celebrate even after 21 years. I will admit that last year with a little Hunter man around that it was a little better and I'm hoping this year, it will be a little more. He's two now! Even though it will be bitter without Lariat with us, but I know he is getting the help he is needing.

Tomorrow I go in to have cancer removed off my face and then Tuesday they remove the cancer off my back. For the first time in a long time I'm nervous about a procedure. Normally I'm not but for some reason I am. Last October they had to remove two places off my face and Dr. Parker did a great job but I don't know I just have a "gut" feeling. So please pray for good results. It's going to be two early days as I'm doing it early, early so I can get back into the office and work a full day each day.

The Christmas tree is up and decorated and the house is ready to go. I had to get all of this done this past weekend so I could have it done and not worry about it this week. I must say the tree is beautiful and no saws were involved like last year. Thank goodness! Seriously, this time of the year is to be enjoyed! I need to remember why we celebrate Christmas. Maybe we all should!

Seriously! What else...

I'm usually the most positive person! Seriously! I am! I go thru more crap and have more crap heaped on me than I sometimes think I can personally take. And sometimes I get myself in the middle of stuff just because I'm also the most honest, I just tell people how I feel. I've always felt like why not just say what you feel. Don't lie to a person, tell them how you are feeling, state the facts, lay it out there and get it on the table and let's deal with it. Let me see if I can put all of what has transpired the past few weeks.

First of all Thanksgiving I spent alone. Didn't mind that at all since I felt like crap, had a ton of work to get done for the sales meeting and could do it all day long without a phone ringing and any interruptions. I spent the entire and I mean the entire day working, it felt good. I got almost everything I needed done for my sales meeting done and out of the way before the L man and I spent some time Friday doing some Christmas shopping and then Saturday spending some football down time.

Monday morning I headed out to the airport at 6:00 AM for a flight to CA for our company National Sales meeting. Now I have know idea why we need to get there at noon for our meeting to start the next day and I have to sit between 6 month old twins screaming but this was my Monday. My coworker and I spend hours running around getting stuff together for the meeting which I could have done here and shipped but I spent my afternoon doing there. Then on Tuesday the Marketing Team comes up with the idea that we are going to do the Amazing Race and for 7 hours we are running around doing this race and I'm talking physical biking, running, and taking a toll on my body. I was puking by the end of the evening. My team mates were wonderful, they were let's walk it and not run. I was tired, exhausted and could have cared less about this team effort. I'm not one to turn individuals you are trying to make into a team against one another but that is my thought only. I was so tired and sore that on Wednesday I had such a bad headache while we were in meetings and again on Thursday all day. Now, the problem came when the sales team try to "open the door and tear down the wall" between marketing and sales. When we tried tearing down this wall, one individual became very defensive and instead of trying to hear us, she just got all defensive. Now I knew this was going to be a bad idea to begin with since no one would really state what they want to say clearly, everyone was sugar coating the fact, when for months now it's been stated loud and clear. So, I just stated the fact that she wasn't hearing what we were saying and I got barked out by her. Seriously! I'm trying to move it on and get off the subject and she's giving me the "I wasn't born yesterday" speech. She even got upset when she won the "Suck Up" Award earlier in the day. This has been awarded to the new person every year. Seriously! Get over it! Did I get all upset when I had to run the Amazing Race when I didn't want to! Hell no! Should have I done the race! NO! Would my physicians have had a cow! Hell yes - one had three! Do a walk where I pace myself yes - but put myself thru shit like that - SERIOUSLY! What was I thinking! TEAM! Did I think twice before I did that - no! Did she think twice before she said something, no. Do I wish I would have thought twice before I said something, oh yeah! I wished I would have done what I promised myself when we first brought up this subject. Keep my mouth SHUT! Seriously, I came home from our sales meeting, Larry took one look at me, said what happened, I told him how our sales meeting ended and how she thought I was the bad guy. Even at dinner when I was trying to explain, she was telling me how she never expected something like that from me. Seriously!

On a sweeter note! After buying my own ticket home, since my company thought it was necessary to come home thru Phoenix and spend 60.00 on baggage fees each way to say 1.80 on airfare. I came home on American and was able to fly First Class, thank you God for Plat status. I was able to get home about 6 hours earlier, get chemo, radiation and spend some quiet time.

Hunter and Ashley arrived on Saturday and we spent some time together then Hunter spent the night with T-Lee. We watched some football and then we hit the sack. Then on Sunday we went to the pet store to buy some fish and then home to watch the Cowboys beat up on the Colts. I love beating some Manning. Sorry! We played trains most of the day and then he spent the night with me again. I love some Hunter. The sweetest thing, before he goes to sleep at night, he has to "hug" a picture that has his "ma" "da" and "uncle chance". Then he goes to sleep. On Monday I took him to see the Trains at Northpark at lunch before I met Ashley. He was so sweet. He's really good if you tell him his schedule, like today we will do this, this and this. Then he kisses me and we do our stuff. One night I was tired and I climbed into bed and he was finishing watching the movie UP, I could see him on the sofa in my office and every once in a while he would glance at me in the bed. He's adorable. I love our time together and it makes me realize that my time on this earth is pretty precious and that life has it's most precious moments and I'm going to grab them. Seriously!

Thankful for...

Where have I been? The question should be where haven't I been. I finished the 3Day and was home a couple of days only to do a day trip for business to McAllen. The next week I was off to St. Louis, MO for four days on business and on Friday our PPAS Board worked all day on our year long plan. So much in such a short time. This week I've been working here in Dallas and on my presentations for our national sales meeting in CA next week. On top of all of this, I started radiation on my lung tumor and had my Friday AM chemos, a new crown on a tooth, worked with a co-worker on a "game" for one of the presentations for next week and was able to get new "hair" today. WOW! Oh and Hunter came for a visit last weekend. Yes, the little man came to stay with me. He was so cute and so loving. I enjoyed every minute. He's 27 months old now. The cutest thing is that he would gather pictures from around the house and point to his Mom and say "Ma" and "Da" and "Uncle Chance" (well the best you can) and wanted to know when they were coming. It broke my heart when he pulled me to the sliding glass door and wanted me to sit down and wait. We did this once when his mom and dad went to a movie when he was just a year old and he still remembered that. Smart boy. We played trains and cars and he has this little dance he does that just makes me laugh. He was going to the potty and wearing big boy underwear. When we went to bed he had to put a photo of his mom and dad right on the pillow. I loved having him so much. Before I took him home on Sunday we went to Petsmart and looked at all the animals. He loved that!

As Thanksgiving arrives in a few hours I reflect on the past year. I'm Thankful for so much! I'm thankful that I have friends and family that love me, even when I'm grouchy and not the most pleasant person after treatment and going thru some of the roughest times. When medicines make me feel as if I have the most vile stuff in my system. I'm thankful that I have a company such as Evans that has seen me thru the economy and thru some rough times. I'm thankful that I still have two children, one that is getting the help he needs and has given me a daughter-in-law that is willing to stick out the tough times with him and given me a grandson that is healthy and happy and another son that has two great jobs and is independent and takes the time to participate in things such as the 3Day with me and calls me. I'm thankful that ASI awarded me the Bess Cohen Humanitarian Award - a most humbling honor. I'm thankful that I have a man who continues to love me. I'm thankful for all the doctors and nurses who take care of me and continue to give me life. I'm thankful to the drug companies that continue to develop drugs that they allow me to be a guinea pig of. I think this is the one thing I can do to make a difference. If it doesn't heal me at least it will be a stepping stone in curing someone someday. I'm thankful that my Cowboys are winning a few games lately (Yes - I am!). I'm thankful that God has decided that I'm worthy of being on this earth another year, when Seriously, I should not be according to doctors. What are you thankful for?

I'

3Day/21 years ago!

I did it! I made it thru the 3Day 60 miles - OK I managed 54 miles this time. Friday morning was cold but absolutely beautiful. Our team of eleven, nine of us were able to walk together. We had two that were slower walkers but 9 us us that could keep the same pace. We began the day at Colin Creek Mall just as the sun broke and walked our little legs off. About one our encouragement and nourishment team met us at a little place right around the corner from my house. I had fajitas and a Corona (Yes I did) before we continued on the day. At our last cheering station our "e&n" team had "pink pantie pull downs - our signature drink" for us and our friend Tim came and did massages for us. My hip was killing me and sometime during the day my left knee was hurting for some reason and the last three miles was giving me some pain. But I finished! My favorite two things during the day was the Mother standing next to her daughter in the neighborhood that thanked us for walking so she could be healed to now take care of her daughter who is battling the disease now. And the young lady in the Ellen tee that was in a wheelchair trying to maneuver these Dallas streets and Jason assisting her up the curb to camp. She was a hero in my eyes.

Saturday started off cold again but was another beautiful day on the path. I woke up feeling pretty good. The legs were feeling fine after a nights rest in my own bed. The "e&n" team had breakfast with nuggets, burritos, hot chocolate w/Godiva chocolate and mimosas (I even filled a flask with one!). A half a mile from lunch I turn to say something to the team and I turned back around a hit a "toe crack" and caught my toe and twisted my left knee and I was hurt. I called for help while I kept walking but I knew I was in trouble. My knee felt like I had popped something. The entire left side felt like it was burning. The L man picked me up and took me to get cleaned up (with a flushing toilet-this is huge for a walker, since we use port a potties for 3 days) before taking me to meet everyone at the lunch site. There was a super surprise waiting for me. Chance had arranged for Ashley and Hunter to come join us. Yes! Of course I started feeling better when T-Lee saw Hunter. I had to take off my cap for him to recognize me but the moment I did he smiled so big and came running up to me. I was crying and it wasn't from my knee either. I was able to get seated and get ice on my knee and Hunter was talking to me. It's been over 3 months since I've seen him. He's so big and Ashley sat right next to me. It was decided that with the pain being so bad no matter what position the knee was in that I should not finish the next 6 miles with the team and take it easy. I went home with the family and just rested the knee and iced it off and on all day and night. After Ash and Hunter went home, Chance and hit the bed about 8.

BTW: Ashley has promise to allow me to see Hunter more!

Sunday morning I woke up feeling really good. The knee felt great. Larry swore I wasn't going to be able to walk today. But I was good to go. I met the team at 6:30 and off we went. Our encouragement and nourishment team had a great lunch for us at Arlington Hall and we were able to rest for a while. We were on a kick rear pace and we all felt good for having walked. Sharla would be so proud.

We had a team dinner last night. Tons of toasts were made. Kay and Al - Sharla, Jason and Shelva's parents, spoke about how Sharla would have been proud of us and how proud they were. Sharla Schooley's Angels do rock.

21 years ago today, my precious angel, Taylor Cheyenne Garrett went to heaven. I miss her! I know she's rocked in the arms of Jesus. I was proud to be her mother for 8 months and 10 days.

"Our memories give us...

Seriously, It's Thursday and the 3 Day begins tomorrow. I'm in RUSH mode already. This week has flown by already. I tried my best to rest over the weekend. I sofa surfed as much as I could, though I did sneak out for a party on Saturday over to my girlfriends for a Ranger watching party and apparently that was the secret because they won but we just couldn't pull it off the rest of the series. But it's okay - those Rangers made me proud, they played with heart and soul and to see Jim Sundberg again and Nolan Ryan every night - WELL that can make a girl HAPPY! Now for my Cowboys, let's just say I still have HOPE for them. HOPE they can find heart and soul to play like the old team they were.

Monday I drove down to Houston for appointments and a luncheon. Monday I got the news that I have to have Mohs surgery on the cancer on my face and back for sure. Tuesday, I finally was able to have that schedule for December (my November is booked solid) and I was told that I have to start radiation again on the lung tumor that has grown. I had a small melt down and my rant against cancer and how badly I hate it. It lasted a whole 45 minutes before I realized that I could stomp it out this weekend with a good walk. LOL! I'll start radiation on Monday. I drove home on Wednesday and worked until Midnight. I have a long list of things to do today, to get ready work wise just so I can take off a couple of days. I also have to find a new Executor of my Estate, as mine told me yesterday that she doesn't want to do it after being on it for a year. I just wish she could have waited to tell me instead of telling me a couple of days before the walk. When she said she's been wanting to tell me for a long time - whatever that is suppose to mean. She rode in the car with me for 600 miles 5 weeks ago, could she have told me then.

Tonight we have our team dinner. Our teammate Jana has it at her house so we can "carb up". I love this. We have 13 walking on our team (ok 12 - we still count Sharla even though she left us on March 10th) - Sharla Schooley's Angels. My friend Mike came up with an inspirational quote for us. I love him for it. "Our memories give us the energy to take each and every step. It is the hope that gives us the determination to finish." Seriously, that is what will get me to finish 60 miles this weekend. OK and the support and love of my family and friends!

If each of you will say a prayer for our team, I would be thankful. Chance will keep everyone posted on Facebook. Seriously, stomping out cancer is on my list this week!

Believing!

Where in the world have I been? Better yet, where haven't I been! I came back from walking 60 miles, was home a whole day and left for San Antonio to see clients and do a show. My Mom was in the hospital while I was there (how convenient was that). So, in between appointments and shows and everything else I was running back and forth to the hospital. First of I am a compassionate person, but my poor Mother is the most negative person on earth and I'm just the opposite. This is one of the main reasons I've NEVER told my Mother I'm ill. OMG, she would have me dead already and I mean DEAD! I believe you should always be positive when dealing with a ill person, you should try giving positive energy of some type. Even when a person is dying, I've always been the type to say things like "it's okay to fight the fight until you are ready to quit". I've just always believed that positive energy makes every situation so much better. In my Mother's case, I mention I'm not feeling well, and she swears I must have some deadly disease and she doesn't even know what is going on. Only if she knew. Any way, while there in San Antonio, my Mother had them run every test possible. The doctor was kind of enough to run the heart cath at 6AM so I could be there before I had my show set up. He was so sweet. So, my Mother has a blood disorder like pre-leukemia, which is not life threatening, she just has to watch it. But you would think she was dying, to hear her tell it.

I came home on a early flight on Friday morning so I could have chemo and then I left Sunday to go to the Minnesota/Dallas game with my friend Shelley Sake. I had so much fun! I've always wanted to see a game with her and this was my chance. She has season tickets and the joy to share this game with her in the MN Dome was WOW. I loved every minute - even the loss the Cowboys took! I allowed myself a vacation day and enjoyed the Mall of America there and had dinner with Shelley on Monday evening. It was so nice. I came home on Tuesday AM and enjoyed the week working here in the Dallas area. Even seeing the Rangers win to go to the World Series on Friday night was a WOW moment too! That is a team that BELIEVES!

Monday, I hit the air again for KC. The week has just flown by with the Cowboy loss on Monday and the Rangers loosing on Wednesday and Thursday. Seriously! But I still believe that we can win! Both teams! We can still pull it off. I had only 1 in 4 doctors believe that I would still be alive now! So, I will always BELIEVE - until the very last moment.

I'm gearing up for another 60 miles next weekend here in Dallas. I can't believe it's already here. It is and believe it or not, I'm doing it again. Chance is coming in and staying with me for the 3 Days. He'll keep everyone updated on Facebook. The nice thing is he believes I can do it! Is there something you've been wanting to do? Something you believe in? Go do it! Believe in yourself!

Komen 3 Day in Washington, D.C.

Well, I did it! 60 miles, well ok 54 miles in 3 Days. I had to take a "sweep"van for a few miles. This was the toughest of the walks I've done. If you've never done this type of walk, it's not only tough on the body but emotional as well. Let me see if I can give you a run down of my days.

I arrived on Thursday evening with Courtney. She was participating in her 9th walk, her 2nd this year. She'll be doing 3 total come Dallas. I aim to be like her and she's just twenty six. Our hosts Mark and LeeRoy were putting all eight of us up at their home. 7 Angels were walking this year with Reed doing "encouragement and nourishment". Mark prepared spaghetti to carb us up for the walk the next day.

Friday morning we woke up nice and early and prepared to ride the subway into Navy Yard to begin our walk at Nationals Park and 20.5 miles the first day. We saw some beautiful sights that day as we wound our way around the U.S. Capitol building, past the Smithsonian Museums and worked our way thru northwest Washington, DC into Bethesda. Reed was there to cheer us on as well as some people from the area. Jason, our team captain, become seriously ill about mile 5 and had to go home, Courtney being the Angel she was went with him. It was bad and that evening when we all arrived home, Jason was on his way to the hospital. It turned out he stayed two nights and was released Sunday to fly home. We still don't know if it was food poisoning or something viral. I say it was the egg thing he ate that morning. Just saying! That was the only item he ate the rest of us did not. We ordered Pizza that night and some of the team were determined not to walk the next day and went to bed early. But...

As my alarm went off at 6:30 Saturday morning and I climbed out of my sleeping bag to shut it off, my body aching and I said "oh no, I'm not walking". I descended the stairs down to the girls room and Shelva said "tj are you walking". I said "I think I can do 15 today". She said "I'm in" and Linda said "I'm in". I then went to tell Lorenzo, we were walking. Courtney was in and all 5 Angels were walking as Greg was at the hospital with Jason. The funny thing was I was the last to be ready. Reed came to me and said "are you ready". I growled at him and said "give me 5 minutes". I found out later that he came downstairs and said "she really needs 5 minutes". I was downstairs 5 minutes later. When I apologized later for being so grouchy at him, he laughed and said "the funny thing was, I took one look at you, hair all a mess, no makeup and I thought, she really does need more than 5 minutes". He was so sweet. This day was the toughest. The hills were bad. I'm talking busting your butt. Even marathon runners were having trouble with these hills. There were times that I found myself saying "tequila shot, tequila shot" all the way up a hill. Now, I don't drink much at all. I never did take a shot of tequila but for some reason that saying got me up many a hill. This was the day, I swept a bit. A sweep van is a van you can ride from one pit to another. I had blisters at one point that I had to see medical for. I've never had to do that. Normally, I can fix them myself, but these were bad on my soles. Both feet. I'm glad I went because the medic taught me what to do and we shared as to why we do these. We started the day in Bethesda and walked through Gaithersburg, MD on thru Blohm Park and finished back at camp that night. We walked thru tons of wooded areas and parks that day. That evening we headed to the hospital to see Jason before we headed "home". There Mark had prepared brisket and home made potato salad for us. Bed came pretty early after "popping blisters" and prepping feet and soaking bodies in tubs! BTW - did I say that this was a 23.5 day.

Sunday, last day of the walk. Reed and LeeRoy dropped us off at the starting point in North Bethesda. We would be walking the same route as we had walked on Friday. This would be a 16 mile day. We traveled past, the National Zoo, through Woodley Park and the cheering section at Dupont Circle. Now we stopped for lunch there and I had a weird thing happen. We were only about 4 miles from the end. We sat outside and listened to the cheering section and had brunch. I went inside to use the restroom and this woman asked me "when are you going to stop with all this mess and stop interrupting my day". Since I wasn't sure when the cheering was going to stop, I stated "I'm not sure". Now she's really starting to piss me off cause she's making this personal and I just look at her and say "when cancer is cured". I didn't notice that she had followed me outside but when I started to sit down she was right there and she looked at me and said "you need to work one on on with cancer survivors". I said "I am a cancer survivor". She must have had mental problems because she was wearing a wool coat and hat on a hot October day. I sat at the table and had a good cry because during the previous days, we really hadn't had that many people come out to cheer us on and it was so good to have so many come out on Sunday. I hope God finds a place for her. We finished our walk by going right by the White House on to the Reagan building to rest and we had our closing ceremony at the Washington Monument. We all went to eat at Linda's favorite place that evening.

Monday, we all packed and went in to Alexandar, VA for some sight seeing and then on to the airport to head home. Thank you for upgrades!

Now, some of my favorite memories from these days: On Friday, the woman in the car wearing the white headband that honked her horn and touched her heart to say, she was touched that we were walking. Bob, the Army vet, with his prosthetic leg, pushing his wheelchair sometimes and in it others but finishing all 60 miles. And at closing, taking off his leg to raise his shoe in honor of the survivors along with all of us. To the 23 year survivor that cheered us along and cried right along with us as she hugged us and said thank you to us. To the woman in the wheel chair that is dying of cancer that welcomed us home. To my teammates that took my hand, when I felt like I couldn't take another step and said "it's okay".

These walks may be difficult but so is fighting cancer. Sharla fought it to the bitter end. We laughed as we thought how she helped arrange the beautiful weather for us. We hope to have pictures up soon on sharlasangels.org. I'll do it again in Dallas in November. Seriously!

If walking 60 Miles in 3 Days is Crazy...

OMG! I'm blogging just a few days apart! I'm gearing up for the walk in DC in a couple of days. I don't know if I mentioned that during my brief night at home of a couple of weekends ago I had to pack for three trips in one night and one of those trips was the 3Day walk. Now, you shouldn't really pack for that trip in just a few hours. However I did! I had to have my bag over to a girlfriend's house the next AM before I flew out that afternoon so she could give it to my team captain the next day to ship the following week. I know, hard to follow, anyway, if you've never done the 60 mile walk, you have to prepare for almost any thing. You may start the day, cold, wet and finish hot. So, I had to pack layers and pack for three days. Not the easiest, my bedroom looked like a sporting good store had exploded in it. But I managed. Sometimes I wonder if my angels above go to God and say "look, we realize she needs help, just give her a break today". I imagine God looking down chuckling at me and just being amused. Seriously! I truly believe this is why I'm still on earth and not in Heaven with Hm. I'd be too darn bossy and a little more than He could handle. I'd have the clouds fluffier and the sky a little bluer and I'm sure that my halo would be crooked most of the time.

During my walks I wear angel wings (I had to pack them for the 3Day, so they didn't come with me to TN). It is only because that will be the only time, I'm viewed as an angel. Seriously!

Now, I'm going to ask for a few prayers. This walk is going to be difficult in a few ways! It will be our first walk as a team without Sharla. It will be my first walk without my family with me. Usually my son Chance goes along. He's my support and I know I can count on him. This is also the first that I honestly don't know if I can walk all 60 miles. So, just pray for the Sharla Schooley's Angels team. Keep up with me on Facebook! I'll also be on Twitter under TJsTake.

If walking miles in 3 Days is crazy, then I don't want to be normal! Seriously!

I don't even let my honey touch me before coffee...

I left home on the Tuesday, the 21st of September to head to Houston, TX for two end user shows and to spend one night before heading off to Gulfport, MS for a show in Moss Point, MS and two luxury nights there. Now, I had to change planes here in Dallas, so I ran to my car and dropped off dirty laundry and picked up some fresh clothes, that was all I saw of TX for the night. I begged the L man to drive thru the airport just so I could catch a glimpse of him. Oh, they checked my bags for explosives, not only in Houston that day but again in Dallas and when I was leaving Gulfport they not only X-rayed my bag, and X-rayed every passenger and they patted every passenger down as well. I said, "sweetie, I don't even let my honey touch me before coffee in the AM". She didn't find it funny at all. I finally spent the night in my own bed Friday night. Saturday afternoon I flew off to TN to join my good friend Jane Abbott for the weekend and walk in the Chattanooga 5K for the Cure with her husband Jeff and son Phil on Sunday. This is something dear to my heart and I wouldn't have had it any other way. Anna ran it with her girlfriends. Thank you but no thanks! Walking was a good warm up to my 60 miles weekend after next. I had blast being there with her until Monday. We had a huge family dinner on Sunday with all the kids except Scotty who is over in Afghanistan with the Marines. I was able to sleep in my own bed Monday night and was off again on the road on Tuesday after a show here in Grapevine. I drove up to Tulsa, OK where we had a show on Wednesday and then over to OK City on Wednesday evening where we had a show on Thursday. When I finally arrived home on Thursday night I was never so happy to see my home and my own bed. I might love what I do, but I sure love being home.

I had a great time seeing my friends in TN/GA. Jane and I caught up on all the current "girl talk" and had a fun just hanging with each other. I love being with my "other family".

I think it's time a do some serious time home. I was home a total 14 nights in September. Seriously! I'm home a little more this month.

Cowboys won! I now have the formal figured out. I can't watch them, I can't wear a jersey on game day and I must walk at least 3 miles for them to win. Well, they have a bye this week and next weekend I'll be doing the 60 miler in DC. So, that should not be a problem!! LOL!

I can't complain. Life is good - prayers are answered - not always in my way - but in His way. I just have to remember who is in control.

As I'm gearing up to leave on Thursday for this awesome 60 mile 3Day walk for the Cure. I'm requesting prayers. Would you please pray that my team and I make it safely thru the three days, that I have the will to say enough each day and not push it and that God reminds each of us why we do these walks. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Seriously!

The week I wished I could forget!

It has been an emotional week. First of all I had to fly to St. Louis Monday morning and then drive over to a small little town for a meeting. Did you just ever have one of those meetings where every thing that you suggested for their flyer or catalog the client rejected or thought you were out of your mind? Will this was that type of meeting. So after finally getting the manager to "see it my way" and I don't know why he wasn't trusting my judgement, I mean I have led them right the past two years, I just wanted him to take me out back and put me down. We were in a middle of a cow pasture after all (no, I'm not joking). I had to call my friend Mike just to ask the question "why did I do this job". For Mike to remind me "it's the 5 star hotels we stay in and the wonderful dining and the first class accommodations". Which none are true, but at least it made me laugh during the hour and 15 minute drive in my Nissan Rogue rental that was on it's last leg.

Tuesday, I had appointments in the St. Louis area. Most likely my favorite day. I did get my flu shot. Can you believe it - I'm in MO and was able to get my vaccination. Thank goodness! I had to set up for a show that evening and ran into all my buds, what a great way to end the day with Pizza and beer and buds.

Wednesday, the PPAM had their show in St. Louis and then we loaded up and headed to KC, KS. First of all I allowed a MN Viking to ride with me. Trouble! Just joking - Curt needed a ride since he couldn't get a rental once in town since he's license was expired. We had a terrible thunderstorm all the way in the 3 hour and 45 minute drive but it was worth it as we headed in and got set up and then headed to my favorite eating place in the entire state - Jack Stack BBQ. WOW!

Thursday, PPAM had their show in KC, KS. What can I say about this day, except in all my days of doing this job I've never had this happen to me. I had a man named CB come into my booth and he asked me what a product was and I told him it was the Go Green Bag Holder. When I explained that it was a holder for reusable bags to place on your grocery cart, he just went off on me. Called me a "true huggin, Obama lover" and then gave me the hail Hitler salute. I had to ask the man to leave my booth. What has the world come to, when you have crazies at trade shows as shallow as this. I reported him to the association but what is worse, he made me so angry I cried. Then I became angrier that I allowed him to get to me. OOOOOO!!!

I finally made it home on Thursday night with a big sigh. I was ready. Friday between chemo, work, radiation and everything else, I was trying to make sure I had everything in for the fundraiser on Saturday.

Let me talk about Saturday. It's been weighing heavy on my heart. My friends know that these walks mean more to me than anything. I would walk to the moon and back to make sure we raise enough money to find a cure for cancer. On Saturday was our fundraiser Pretty in Pink. So many of my friends have donated money, items to assist me in making sure that we get what we need to make the money to raise what we need to walk as a team. This year I've asked some very dear friends to help me out. But I was made to feel very "unwelcome" by my team captain on Saturday morning with one of my donations and then again on Saturday evening with another by the fact that he didn't even acknowledge the song that I had professionally written for us and all downloads are going to our team. We could have at least played it that evening or announced that you could purchased it. We did put a piece a paper with the info in the bags we handed out but I think hearing it would have helped. Now, it wouldn't be so bad if these would have been "oh, tj I didn't realize" but these were things we had spoken about in previous team meetings. One of them, he said I didn't give any solutions and it seemed as if he was saying I had presented a problem. He upset me so that I actually had to walk out of the last 30 minutes of set up. The L man was so surprised when I said "let's go". Oh, he was happy to have be get home and rest more, but I was so upset we couldn't really enjoy our time together. The team captain sent me a text but I wouldn't even respond and then he had one of the team members call me to make sure I was going to show up that evening. Which I was, I just needed to clear my head and I told her that. The event was nice and we raised some nice dollars, I don't know how much.

My thing is I had to remind myself why I do this. I had to pull out my remembrance necklace and look at the pictures of those that have died from this terrible disease we call cancer. I got the picture of Sharla and said "this is the reason, , so another person doesn't have to die of this disease, to find a cure for cancer". I don't do it to be friends (I do it to meet others, that are after the same goal), or to get happy feelings (which by the way, I do!!!), I'm doing it to stomp out cancer. I tucked that picture into my purse and took it to the event with me. They did a touching tribute to Sharla. I remembered all this and the night was okay. I'm still going to have a long talk with Jason and find out where the communication "line" went down. I still wasn't comfortable with what took place but you know what, life isn't always fair, and I for one should know that! Seriously!

Do they give discounts....

I cannot believe another week has flown by. When I think how valuable time is in my life and think how it just zooms by me some days. Seriously, how does it happen. Well, I can't just sit and cry, honestly life is too short! Put a smile on your face and laugh at the small things and get thru them. Seriously!

Let's see if I can recap my week. Sunday, I was able to get in 3 and 1/4 miles of training and what idiot does in in 92 degree TX heat. This one apparently! I thought I was going to have a stroke. I was so hot and humid I was not feeling my super, duper best but my feet needed it and I did it. Monday, thank you for a day off. I kept thinking I would get out and make the most of it but NO. Tuesday, Hermine blew thru here like she owned the joint. I was suppose to drive down to Houston and kept thinking "OH, this will blow thru any minute", well by 4:00, she had not blown thru by any means and I was not going to get on the road. My day had been filled with customers needing this and that and by 7:00 I found myself still in Dallas. Wednesday, Hermine was still in town. I seriously thought I was going to be blown out of my drive as I loaded my car. I asked Mother Nature to come get her derelict child Hermine and please return her more "cooler, rustler, Fall child" as I preferred him. As I headed toward Houston early in the AM there were 3 wrecks outside of Dallas within 30 miles. People, people, people, slick roads, heavy rains, drive a little more safely, SERIOUSLY! I was able to get my calls in and set up for my show the next day and have dinner with great friends. That is what makes my job the best! Thursday there was a show in Houston and then I headed home. Thank you for Sirius radio so I could listen to the game - do these people who decide to do these shows, not realize that the NFL Season Opener was on that night, that reps(like myself) that had to drive home would seriously be impacted (okay not life changing BUUUTTT). Had I know that the biggest New Orleans fan was going to be at the show I would have stayed in Houston with her. Ginger Hutter lives and breathes the Saints like I do the Cowboys. We would have had a blast watching the game together. Thank you Saints for beating up those Vikings. The voodoo doll worked (that's a joke but just in case Shelley Sake is reading this). I got in about 9:30 on Thursday, stayed up until 1:00AM working on e-mails and then got up at 3:15 AM on Friday to head in for my "vitamin drip" and a new radiation therapy. Then spent the rest of the day working. I made up for it on Saturday and I spent the entire day in bed. I only got up for bathroom breaks. Thank goodness for football to keep me there. Today I had a brunch date with the team to finalize our plans for our fundraiser next Saturday and now I'm doing a little packing and getting ready for the week already. Home: where I do laundry and repack!

I can't believe the fundraiser is next Saturday and the following Saturday, I fly off to TN to visit with Jane and walk that Sunday in TN in the Race for the Cure. If life were boring, I wouldn't want to live it. There is so much going on right now. I just looked and my calendar and I'm not really home at all this month. Seriously! I wonder if I could get a discount on my home since I'm only home 14 nights this entire month of September!!!

Football Season has Arrived!

Well, college football season has finally arrived. I survived a long summer in between. Around my house, a house without football, well, it's not a pleasant house. LOL! I love football season, high school, college, pro. I will even watch old football games on the weekends just to get "my fix". I don't know how my family puts up with me. My man will come home and find me with the NFL channel on and a game going and sound asleep. My ring tone is the NFL Fox football sound. I won't change it for anything. This week while at the airport in Dallas I found a shirt that read "I love Cowboys Football" Love and Football were in pink my favorite colors. Thursday night for date night - the Cowboys game and chicken from Bubba's. I'm sure glad my honey loves me.

I was in Baton Rouge and New Orleans on Monday - Wednesday this week for work. I actually had a little fun while there. I'm not able to do that often but when I can, look out world. My friends and I went on a ghost tour in NO. Let me tell you, the only goons I saw, were the one's I was with. Seriously! It was a waste of money, but not time when you spend it with your friends. I enjoy living! I did partake of a shot! It was a small one this time - thank you! Last time I asked for shots in New Orleans, I almost lost my Diamond privileges from Hilton. That will never happen again. OK, I better not say never. But I did learn a valuable lesson. Shots in NO, are not your typical shot glasses. They are party size glasses and when you have to gulp down shots in two drinks instead of throwing your head back on one. You are in trouble. Of course people would say that is what the T stands for in TJ. Seriously! I'm really a good person. I try to tell people that - when they asked why I was named Humanitarian of the Year.

I thought I was never going to get home on Wednesday though. I was to leave on a 4:10 flight. They boarded us, they shut the door and then the pilot said, we aren't leaving for another 2 hours and 45 mins, and "we don't know what we are going to do with you all". Now, as my friends have pointed out, I should be used to this comment. But a plane load of people were highly upset. At 6:00 they told us to board again, and then they told us, "your flight has been cancelled". I thought there was going to be a riot. Fortunately there was a 6:20 flight to Dallas delayed until 7:30. I finally arrived home at 11:00. I was just grateful to get home. These are just little things in life. The funny thing is I was on the plane and I was starving. My friend Nancy had kindly given me a wine bottle filled with nuts before I had left that day. When the flight attendants came around I requested an orange juice no ice and water no ice. I began to open this bottle and the flight attendant, tells me I can't. Now, I'm starved, a little (OK, alot) cranky at 9:00 and I look at her and say, yes I can. She states "mam, you cannot have alcohol on the airplane unless we serve it". Now, I'm thinking, you can't get thru security with less than three ounces of anything in a 1 quart baggy and she thinks I boarded with a wine bottle full of wine. I'm beginning to laugh and I hold up the bottle and say "NUTS". She looks at me and doesn't say I'm sorry, she just starts rolling the cart down the aisle. OK, enough said. It had been one of those days, had it been alcohol, I would have drank it down before we boarded the plane! LOL!

I've had some good training walks on Sunday and Tuesday. Sunday I was able to get in 7 miles. It felt great to know that I could still do it. And I did it all by myself, not with the team. Then while I was in Baton Rouge I got up and did 3 miles on the treadmill. I hope to get some good walks in Sunday and Monday since we have some really nice weather here in TX. Thank you mother nature for being better to us.

I can't believe I have just four weeks until my first walk in October in DC. I'm looking forward to it. I love being with the team and raising money for such a good cause. I'm also looking forward to being in TN with Jane and her family to do a small walk there. It will be good training too.

I think back to all that is going on this month. I made a decision to start having my condo cleaned every other week. This was something that was a major decision for me. You see I have this word in my vocabulary that I don't use very much. The word is "help". I used to not use it at all. I just didn't believe in it. When I was first diagnosed 7 years ago with cancer, I told very few people because I didn't want people to feel sorry for me, when people did find out they were always asking me what they could do for me. Then when I was told that I had less than I year to live. I had to make a decision, to start asking for help. To tell those around me what I needed when I needed it. I wouldn't even tell the doctor's when I was in pain because that meant I would need to ask for medications to deal with it. That is how bad I was. I learned thru a workshop I attended that HELP is not a four letter word like I always thought. It is okay to ask. So, I decided to have someone come in every couple of weeks and do the things around the house that I just don't have the time nor the energy anymore to do. And you know what, it it OK!

Next week is another busy week. But for now, it's football all weekend, a couple of training walks and most of all, I'll continue my affair with my 5 pints of Cinnamon Buns ice cream in the freezer. This time it was the honey who brought them home. Seriously, life is good!

My Affair...

For the past few weeks I've been having a serious affair, with Ben & Jerry's Cinnamon Bun Ice Cream. It's been fun and enticing and desirable but so naughty. Finally, I had to admit it to my honey. Oh, he knew I liked it but he had nooooo idea that I was buying extra pints and consuming them or hiding them in the back of the freezer. The affair finally came to an end yesterday when I went to the store and low and behold, there in it's place sat other flavors of Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream. Now I was hurt! I thought there could never, ever and I was so convinced that I wouldn't be able to replace my two new lovers and their buns with another but I brought home Creme Brulee and Peach Cobbler. As I sat with the L man today and we started scooping spoonful after spoonful in our mouths. I realized Creme Brulee has replaced Cinnamon Buns as my new favorite. That affair may linger another month! BTW - the honey wasn't hurt at all.

This week flew by! I hope it did for everyone who needed it to. I flew into the smallest airport ever, Manhattan, KS on Tuesday. Tiny, friendly and just how I like it. Drove down to Wichita, stayed the night, drove back to Manhattan on Wednesday evening and flew home. I had to drive down to Waco on Thursday for a few appointments and drove back on the same day.

On my drive down to Waco so many memories came flooding back. I used to make that drive back and forth for a few years before I decided to make the move to Dallas. I used to live in Waco and worked there for 5 years before I moved to Dallas in '98. So, every time I go back I have memory flashbacks. I had this strong urge to want to go on down to my home town and visit. I was raised only about 60 miles from there in a little town of about 700 people. I was thinking about Taylor. I need to go visit her grave site. I was remembering that it will be 21 years ago this November 8th that she past away and I was thinking that the time has flown by. Would she really have been 21 this year? I remember the year that it had been 10 years since her death, I was working for Barlow at the time. I was heading down the highway to an appointment and all of a sudden it hit me what the day was. I called my manager, Paul and just said that I needed the day off. I stopped at a florist, asked her to make me a wreath and why. The florist was so sweet, she did it on the spot and I drove the 2 hours home. I just remember how upset I was that I had allowed the years to "sneak" upon me. I'm sure Taylor (little Miss Taylor) as we called her would understand but it just seems yesterday she was here, the boys were running around in their underwear, but it's not, life has happened, but I'm so glad memories are still there.

I had dinner with my friend Heidi on Wednesday night. It was great catching up with her. Life is short and I love catching up with girlfriends. It seems like forever since I've seen her.

Football season - thank you for football and thank you for cooler weather. We've been blessed here in TX for a couple of days.

I've been feeling a little under the weather the past couple of days. Could it be too much ice cream? Oh gosh I hope not. Chemo was rough on Friday and counts were lower but the doctors feel the lower doses they are giving me are on track with the new protocol. They've been asking me more and more about the tanning booths that I used in the past. I swear I cooked my liver to death along with my skin. I wouldn't doubt it if they found out that those things are deadly machines. I used to live in them if I could. But, I will not blame myself for what I've done in the past. For some reason I'm fighting this disease.

The Little Things!

What a week! I just never understand how I make it thru them, ok, I do understand, with the grace of His hands and that one sentence I sometimes whisper "please carry me today because I can't do it by myself." He always does! I don't even have to say "hey God, it's tj here, could You help me out right now", He just seems to know when I'm in need.

Sunday began with set up for a show in Grapevine, TX. I arrived as Neal Young from Sanford was unloading my pallet of stuff the company had shipped in. God bless you Neal! I have the best buds in this industry. Then on Monday the MAPPS show. My youngest, Chance, came in to assist if I needed to go to the bathroom, take a break, lift catalogs, you name it, he was there, more importantly to move stuff out! Love him! Tuesday, we drove down to Houston for the HPPA show and Chance came along. He had time off this week and I'm so grateful, these long road trips are killers on me! The set up on Tuesday and show on Wednesday and then the long drive over to San Antonio on Wednesday evening and set up that evening for the CAPPA show. May I say, OMG! Then show on Thursday and a drive home on Thursday evening! If I hadn't had Chancer along to load and drive and reload and drive, there is no humanly way I could have done this! He was a life saver! Love him for putting up with me, because I'm no angel when I'm tired and cranky. NOPE! I call this week "hell week" due to all the set up, tear down, driving, etc. It's a little too much! Though, I do get to see all my friends and customers and I get to visit, so in that sense I call it a "family reunion". I just don't like the driving and riding. My hips take a beating riding that long.

This week I was also able to get my shirts done for the team - yea!!!! Now to get them imprinted. I also had some surprises as some suppliers donated some items I didn't know about. I love my supplier friends - they are the best! Just when I think I can't get this stuff done - God Blesses me! I'm in awe all the time - gratitude!

My man is back in town from his trip. Thank you! I'm a happy camper - all is right with the world. We are in the same city for the next couple of days.

I haven't trained this week - I need to get my rear in gear - Washington, DC will be here before I know it.

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back & realize they were big things." Robert Brault

I'm grateful!

How does a week just fly by? I've been so busy this week. Thank goodness I've actually been home but just busy. Monday I had "advocacy" training. So, now after all these years of doing what I actually do, I'm now qualified to go out and speak on our industry. It feels pretty good! I still have to put together a power point presentation and find the time to schedule speaking engagements but to know I'm qualified to do it, well, it just feels good.

Between appointments this week, I've been preparing for the next 9 weeks on the road. I have like 5 Association shows, 5 tabletop shows and 4 end user shows, plus appointments in different cities in those weeks and just a ton to get ready for. So preparation has been busy.

I've also been suffering from these intense headaches ever since I suffered the concussion over three weeks ago, I really thought they should have stopped by now. I was having heart palpitations, being dizzy and panic attacks(I would be driving down the road and start getting panicky) and finally they did a scan again and everything was healing and come to find out, it was a medication I was on. They stopped the meds, and within 24 hours, my heart stopped racing, my headache stopped, no more dizziness and I haven't had a panic attack. They had given me the medicine the Saturday after I had struck my head and they put two and two together and this is what it was. OMG! I thought I was going crazy. I'm starting to feel like a new woman again. Thank you God!!!

Training is in full swing. I've had a couple of great walks this week. The body is beginning to remember what it is like to walk those long walks and not fully hating me! Yet! When I walk, it's like therapy. I just release every thing into my walks. If I'm feeling upset, I just pound it out in the pavement. Usually though, I just try to meditate. Think about what's going on in the body and how grateful I am that I'm still alive.

I keep a gratitude journal and every night I write down 5 things that I'm grateful for. This helps me reflect on all the good things that happen through out my day. I used to write down how grateful I was for my job. I love what I do. But last February, I was told by a new manager that I wasn't a team player. This hurt and really broke my spirit. I stopped writing that I loved my job in my journal. The other night a friend sent me a Zig Ziglar attitude video and he made me see that I could still love my job and why I could still be grateful. That is was still buried inside of me, that I was just glossing over it. I realized that one person's words can't break you, unless you allow it. To that friend, I owe him big. I might be in love with him, if I didn't already have a big old teddy bear of my own.

Thursday was Hunter's 2nd birthday. Of course, I'm not allowed to see him, again. I do hope that one day Hunter knows that his T-Lee thought of him everyday and loved him. Hopefully Ashley will grow up one day and quit pulling these stunts. There is hope!

I get up everyday and I ask that the good Lord guide me to be a good loving, loyal person. I say thank you that I'm being granted another day on this earth because I shouldn't in all reality. I try to be grateful for some of the things that I find in the day that come in the smallest of ways.
I'm grateful for friends - those old and new - because they are there to tell you they will donate to your cause, help you in a bind, and the new who will tell you they will throw you a "diamond encrusted life jacket" because you helped them with a project
I'm grateful for doctors - those that will listen to me when I say this is what I'm feeling and I know I wasn't feeling this way 3 weeks ago, can you help me figure it out. And they do!
I'm grateful for my company - they've stuck with me thru this cancer when some owners might have said otherwise. I have an awesome owner and president.
I'm grateful for family - I have two sons - one that I've very proud of right now Chance is a Commissioned Peace Officer and works for the City of Weatherford. And Lariat, well he's getting the help he needs for drugs and alcohol, help he's needed for a very long time. I have a grandson, Hunter that I love so much! Chance and I would love to see him much more but until Ashley realizes we just want to help out, well enough said. I also have the love of my life. The "L" man as I like to refer to him. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't say a thank you for this man. He is my soul mate and my best friend.
These are just my daily gratitude's but every night I write down 5 things I find that I'm grateful for, sometimes my list is longer because some days, I've had a really grateful day!

Lover of weekends!

I'm a lover of weekends. Fridays are always chemo days, so I spend 4AM to about 7:45 AM curled up in a chair receiving "vitamins" as I like to try and envision the poison that drips thru my veins. So by the time I get back to the house and finish my day and the effects take over about 5PM, I'm pretty much wiped out. Friday evenings for me are usually spent curled up on the sofa with aching bones from the effects. They have pretty much gotten the nausea taken care of with my meds they drip in now but the chemo makes me tired. So Friday evenings, I rest up and on Saturday if I don't rise for a really early training walk and I'm talking 4AM for a 8 or 10 mile trek, you'll find me snuggling all day in the bed or sofa surfing as I call it. I'll go from the bed, to the sofa in the living room to the sofa in the office and make the rounds all day long. I have trouble staying in one place very long. The chemos I take, I take a mixture of two, makes my bones ache really bad. It's like having growing pains and muscle cramps at the same time if that makes sense. So laying or sitting for a long time in one position, sometimes just feels like I'm on fire in certain places in my body. On the weekends they give me a little higher doses of pain meds than during the week to get me thru. So, maybe that's why I'm a lover of weekends! LOL!

I got up this morning and met my buds for a good training walk. We walked the mall at Northpark. 6 miles. It felt good and it was great! Then the entire team met this afternoon to go over planning for our big fundraiser in September. OH Goodness it is so close. I have so much to do! I can do this! I have tons to ask for but I know I have supplier friends to help. I'm armed with list and this can be done.

I think back to this fight with cancer and I wonder how I've gotten thru it. Sometimes the power of positive thinking is so great and my belief that God has a greater calling for me. I laugh ever time I think how He just is not ready for me. On my worst days when I think that I'm ready to throw in the towel and just manage my pain and get thru the next few months and I garner the strength to decide to do these walks and I think "where do I get these crazy ideas". Well, I'm sure He's deciding that I can do it and it can be done if I'm willing to say "I'm Yours". Carry me on those days I'm too weak. Believe me, I have many a day when I'm not training for a walk either.

Football is back! I just love football and I mean I love my Cowboys. I grew up with football. So when football isn't on, well weekends are a little harder on me, weekends with football, well, take a guess. I love college and pro. On Saturday and Sundays, my TV (all three) are tuned to football. There is a game on in every room. God bless football. Another reason I'm a lover of weekends!

Training and Raising and Kindness

I've been home two weeks in a row. It's so nice to sleep in your own bed, make coffee in your own coffee pot, sit at your own dining room table and read your hometown paper. I love it! If you've every been a road warrior you would know.

Training for the Komen walks has been going well. This week I sat down and sent out my "begging" letters. Yes, when you are doing two 3Day walks and having to raise 2300.00 per walk, that's 4600.00, that's a lot of dough you have to raise plus they are taking place within a month of one another. I hate to ask for help, but I know I can't do this alone. My friends are terrific people and if they can help they will. Plus my team puts a ton on me because I'm in the promotional business, so I'm the one looking for the t-shirts, cups, napkins, pins all for our fundraiser on September 18th. That's really asking my supplier friends for free stuff. We are doing a "Pretty in Pink" themed party. We are gathering items for the silent auction and we have dinner and all you can drink. It really is a great evening. Sharla would be so proud. If you don't know about Sharla, please go on our website http://sharlasangels.org and read her story. She was an amazing mother, sister, friend. And I'm so honored to be a part of the Sharla Schooley's Angels team. She would be proud of Jason and Shelva and how they have honored their sister. It will be hard this year going on the walks without her. There will be a deep crevice but I know that she will be with us in our hearts. I do these walks because I know that some day there will be a cure for this monster we call cancer. I just know it. I hope and pray everday that I'm still alive when that day comes. That is why that I try to stay so strong now and participate, because I know that should I not survive this, that I would still want someone walking and raising funds. I have benefitted from cancer research dollars, they have kept me alive, so why not keep raising the dollars to help others. Someone did it for me. So I walk because I still can. Seriously!

I received news today from Komen that they weren't going to allow me to check in for Dallas until I had raised the 2300.00 for Washington. I had already signed up and began the check in process for Dallas when I had decided to fully commit to Washington. I was still on the fence. First of all, could the body hold up again this year to two walks, I was testing it out under the training and it has, so I did the sign up. So, now I have to bust rear to get the money raised instead of relaxing a little like I did last year. I'm not going to stress about it, I have angels watching over me. Ha Komen, bet you don't have as many angels as I do!

The training has gone well this week. I think I'm going to join the team on Sunday for an 8 mile. We shall see then. The feet have held up well, no blisters, so the prayers have helped. Thank you all for those. This week, could I ask for prayers that He works out all my fundraising plans. No hassels would be just fine, that's all I'm asking.

BTW, when I walk, I write name of all those that have lost or won their battle with this monster. I also wear a remembrance necklace. If you know of someone you would like me to "walk" for or if you want to send me a picture to wear, you can leave me a comment here or send me an e-mail to tj-garrett@sbcglobal.net. I'm serious about this! This walk is just as much about defeating the monster too! Seriously!

My third grade teacher taught me this Henry James quote "Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind." Thank you Miss Jean. I hope I made you proud!

Seriously, it's been a while!

Wow, it's been a while since my last post. Let's see if I can recap the last couple of weeks without boring anyone. Well, I've had a concussion that I didn't know I had for a week. Yes, I took a fall getting out of the bathtub before I left for Houston on a business trip and I felt like total hell that entire week I was gone, headache, couldn't keep food down, pain management for me was terrible. I really could not figure it out. Now as a mother of two boys, I knew that if you hit your head you want a knot to come up, but I had held ice on my forehead all the way to Houston and didn't think anything of it. I learned later that I actually had worked all week with a concussion. I have a very hard head but I guess not hard enough.

Well, training for two 60 miles walks is well under way. Though I felt like crap this past week, I went and brought my new shoes and I'm on my way to getting into shape for Washington, DC the first weekend in Oct and then Dallas the first weekend in Nov. I can't really wait. I donated my other two pair of shoes when I bought these and I was a little emotional to say the least. They had some miles and memories and then I realized, those memories are all in my heart and head.

I had my Itunes account hacked into on July 10th and didn't find this out until the 17th, so I've been fighting with then until today to get my account unlocked. When I find out who did this, well, I will cause some tj whoop ass. Really! And for Itunes to be such a snot about it. They finally apologized today. These people won't even pick up a phone, it's all done by e-mail and I'm a talk to me person. Try doing this stuff when you travel. Not easy.

I've been banned from the Hunter man again. I knew this was coming since I sent the 3 page typed letter to Lariat and poured out my heart and true feelings and let him know I was not giving any more excuses for him. Oh well, grow it and face life young man. Life is hard and I'll get over it. Hunter will understand one day, it just pisses me off at Ashley, she knows better, she'll come around when she needs money, I'm sure.

Chance came for a visit this week. It was good to see him. He is doing well in his job as a full time dispatcher with Weatherford Police Dept. and his doing some type of volunteer(there is another name for what he does with them) for Roam(sp)PD. He's happy. Most importantly, he's going on the "hell week", that's the week of shows we have here in TX. Thank you God for that. It just so happens his days off falls during that week.

I have to talk about something that was done for my team this week. Ryan Patrick Imming of RPI music has done something totally amazing. First of all you all know that I walk on a team called Sharla Schooley's Angels. It's named for Sharla Schooley who lost the fight in March of this year. Anyway, I was looking for a creative way to raise money for our team. After all we each have to raise 2300.00 for each walk we participate in. Like I have to raise 4600.00 in 3 months. Anyway, I had sent Ryan a message asking if he would write a song for us to sell. I didn't know if he would do it. I mean I've met Ryan a couple of times, I know his wife Anya Imming, she reps for Peerless, but Ryan is busy, so I didn't know if he would have time to do this. But immediately, he came back and said when, where, what do you need and of course I will. Well, this week, he went above and beyond. Not only did he write the song, he offered to put it on his site and let us link it, he will give all the proceeds to us. So, for .99 cents you can download this song called "When I Hold On". You can go onto my Facebook page to see the link. It's touching, it's awesome, it will make you cry! I will never, ever be able to repay Ryan for his kindness, his generosity, he has given a gift that can never be returned. The thought that this could raise all types of funds for cancer is great. I hope you all like it as much as I do.

Well, pray for no blisters, no shin splints, and tons of miles in. I have miles of training to go and 120 miles to prepare for. Pray for continuous health for me that God gives me strength to make these walks happen. He is has been so good to me.

"It's what you learn after you know it all that counts." - John Wooden

A little rest!

Thursday night the lunch bunch gals and others gathered at Diane's to celebrate McKenna's new little boy coming into the world soon. God has chosen September 11th for him to enter this world. What a glorious date for him to be born. Most people remember that date as something terrible but I think of that as a date that changed our world. A ton of people left there homes that glorious day expecting nothing but the best and found themselves face to face with God. It just goes to show you that we must all never take life for granted. It just reminds me that we must never leave for the day without saying a "I love you", no matter if it's just to run down the street. It was so great to see everyone. There is nothing like girlfriends and there is not a one of those women that I wouldn't run to help if asked. Good friends.

No chemo this weekend. I arrived Friday morning but my counts were "so out of whack" that they wouldn't proceed with treatment. This is the first time in a while that this is happened but I should have known something was up. I've been so crabby and tired the past couple of weeks and especially the past week. They gave me a prescription for an antibiotic but I got so busy on Friday trying to get everything done for this coming week that I just didn't get over to get it filled. Finally Friday about 7:30PM I called to see if I could come in for an IV drip of antibiotics. They were just fine with it due to the fact that my counts were so low. I'm glad I did, I just felt so bad. Saturday, I awoke feeling better but still tired. We ran a couple of errands and then I slept most of the day away. I finally was sound asleep by 6:30 last night and slept until 7:30 this morning. I have an early day tomorrow since I have to leave here by 6:00 to drive to Houston.

Not much more to report. It's been so boring around the Garrett household. Sleep and sleep and that's about it! Except Training camp is about to start and nothing gets me more excited than football!

Think, Laugh, Cry

I have the best doctor. Dr. Cather called me herself a few hours ago to let me know that the place on my chest that she removed last Friday she got all clear margins and that the two places on my back were precancerous and that she was pleased with and both were "clean". She said that "I was not falling apart". I just love her. She still not taking new patients but if you want a good dermatologist she is the best.

Hunter and Ashley came up on Sunday to visit. Hunter wasn't feeling well. The doctor had prescribed some 83.00 medicine for him that Ashley couldn't afford and I certainly couldn't. I went to my pharmacist and she told me what to get over the counter for him that would help. It was only about 10.00. Hunter was to stay the night but he was a little clingy, so I felt that he shouldn't. I'm really glad he didn't because I woke up Monday, not feeling by best. I think I might have caught what he had from the week before.

I flew into Kansas on early Tuesday morning and had meetings all day. Man my butt was dragging so by the time I got to the hotel yesterday. It had been dragging so much that it had rug burns. LOL! I feel a little better today. Not as tired.

I had a phone conversation with Ashley today which really ticked me off. She said that Hunter couldn't spend the night on Monday night with Chance because Lariat said so. Lariat who is sitting in a jail cell and wants me to send him money is saying his younger brother can't keep Hunter because he doesn't know him. Bullcrap! Chance is the most responsible person I know. He is a police office for Heaven's sake. If the Weatherford Police Department trust him - Lariat should, but of course Lariat has DWIs and has been smoking pot lately so I don't think his judgement is very clear. If I find out that this is Ashley making this judgement. Well, let's just say I won't be very happy. I won't be sending Lariat any money but I will be sending him a letter to let him know how I'm feeling and that he better get his s..t together. He has a choice to make and that Chance is stepping up to the plate to help out. Ashley is been manipulating me lately and I'm over it. In my letter to Lariat I told him to grow up and to make a decision to wallow or make some good life choices for himself and Hunter. I was frank. It made me feel better, that's all that matters at this point.

I'm gearing up for the 3Day walks. Two this year - DC in October and Dallas in November. I love the team I'm on and I love doing these. I'd walk to the moon and back with Jason. We always have something to laugh about and that's what's important in this lifetime. Don't forget to "think, laugh, cry at least once every day of your life".

What's been going on!

What's been going on in my world...So much. Hunter came for a visit on Monday and stayed for a night. We had a great time. This is the first time since he was about 6 months old that he's stayed the night without his parents. He was so precious. We had the best time. We went for a swim and had a great time together. He absolutely loves his Uncle Chance. I would just mention Chance and he would say "Chance". He would get on the phone with him and talk. I have video of him on the phone. I swear they spoke about 10 times between the two days. It was my favorite.

On Tuesday and Wednesday I was in Austin for business and at night a little fun. The owner of my company was in town with his family. Ben, his youngest was playing in a Jr. Volleyball Tournament there in Austin and it was so much fun to watch his team play every night.

On Thursday I came home and stopped by Byron and Cathy's. They fed me the best food. Thank God to have good friends on the way home.

Friday, was chemo and radiation day. It was also my 3 month check up with my dermatologist. I had three places removed. The one on my chest, she at first thought wasn't a big deal but would check anyway, once she cut into it, she told me it was "a good catch since it felt different". We will wait and see what the pathology reports say.

The honey is out of town for the next week, so today I'm resting up. Hunter is coming for a visit again tomorrow afternoon and will stay the night with me again. I'm guessing you all are wondering why he's starting to stay so much. Well, I don't talk about this much but my oldest son, Lariat had his probation revoked last week. Lariat has had a drug and alcohol problem since he was 17, he is now 28. He once was heavy into meth and beat it but he's been in trouble off and on. He can't seem to stay away from smoking the pot. I thought that he would do it for Hunter and he has for a while but a few months ago he started back up. He's unhappy, depressed, he has been all of his life and it goes back to Taylor's death. He's needed therapy since that time and my ex husband didn't think the boys should get any. He thought therapy made a person weak not better. Lariat once told a friend of ours that he caused Taylor's death because a week before she died he said "he wished she'd never been born". So now Lariat is sitting in a Johnson county jail waiting on a hearing to see what his fate is. He's facing at least 2 years. We are hoping to see if we can get him some rehab help. That is the one thing he's never had in all these years. I don't know what to do any more for him. Emotionally and financially, I'm drained. Lariat realizes that I love him but I won't support his habit but I will support him in getting help. I will make sure that Hunter makes it out this with out too much emotional damage, that is why he's coming to visit as much as I can take without tiring myself out.

Well, that is what is going on in my world. Until we talk again.

Windshield time!

As I'm sitting here getting another dose of "vitamins". I'm reflecting on my week. It's been a hard one. First of all, I've been all over west TX. I flew into Lubbock on Monday and then drove over to Odessa for meetings. The best thing when driving back to Lubbock was when my tire felt low. I stopped at a farm and ranch place and low and behold, there before me was a "tire pony" just for Mr. Hunter. So, into the car went a pony swing with a red, white and blue mane. Too cute and a no flat. God's way of saying "hey, take a detour, look here". Love it. He has the most amazing way of getting my attention these days. Thank YOU!

On Tuesday after a meeting in Lubbock, I headed over to Amarillo. Did you know there is a town called Happy, TX? Yep! On my way back from my meetings, I actually stopped in Happy. Took a few pictures. I actually wanted to talk to someone to find out if they were happy to live in Happy but I couldn't find anyone in the 600 and something town. Wow - that is fewer than the number of people in the town I was raised in. I wonder if they play 6 man ball. Again, taking a little time to find out about the little things in life now days. I'm not missing anything anymore. I've driven by that town 10 times in my years of travel. This was my chance!

I drove just under 600 miles in two days. I was exhausted and ready for some bed. I used to love windshield time. Not so much anymore. Though I did some a ton of farm and green tractors. I haven't seen those in a while. God has planted some seeds. That I'm grateful for.

Wednesday after some meetings in Lubbock I flew home. I got in just as the storms blew thru. Thank you weather Gods.

I'm doing a little sofa surfing this weekend. Going to enjoy a little downtime, fireworks, some good food but no big plans unless I can get my hands on a little Hunter man. Then everything could change in a heartbeat. Life with that little man around, well my attitude changes from ho hum to hot diggity dog. I don't care if I feel like ground in dirt. When he's around I can muster the largest smile and my heart swells with love. Thank you God for granting me a Grandson!

pain this week and talk about Taylor Cheyenne

It's been a week. I've been in pain, the pain that the meds just weren't stopping. No matter the time or quantity I was taking would not stop or assist in stopping the pain. I don't know if you've ever been in pain and can't make it stop - it gets to a point of where you just want to either drink yourself intoxicated or over medicate or just put yourself out of pain the only way left - death. This along with only being able to sleep about 3 hours at a time at night is really catching up with me. My doctor's thought if I went to a support group that it would help me, it only made it worse for me. These people just moan and groan, I at least can laugh about what's going on with me and then cry but I can't cry about having cancer 24/7, I just can not do it. I need to be around people than can respond to me with "what type of cheese would you like with your whine". That is what I need. My doctors have compounded some new pain and sleep meds and I started on those on Friday night and finally got 6 and 8 hours of sleep Saturday and Sunday and on Saturday even was able to get a good 5 hour nap and today a good 4 hour nap. These are just things my body is going to have to have more of. My physicians are hoping that the new mix of meds will help me.

Sarah came for a visit on Friday night. It was such a pleasure to have her here to visit and spend time with. I miss her. I've always felt she is my daughter. I will always hold a special place in my heart for her. I'm proud of what she's done in her life. She's going on to coach at Nocono this next year and I'm a proud "half-Mother". I hope to keep in touch with her more.

Then on Saturday night I had someone call my cell phone and ask for Cheyenne. It took my breath away. My Taylor Cheyenne would have been 20 years old and sounded like the young girl on the phone. It broke my heart and I caught my breath. There were so many things going thru my head "was this a joke", "did they know", should I say that my Cheyenne had died years ago. All I said was "you must have the wrong number". It brought back the memories of our family discussing what we were going to call our little girl. Eddy, and the boys wanted to call her Cheyenne. The way Chance pronounced Cheyenne. It was so cute. They wanted to keep that country name. I wanted Taylor. Little Miss Taylor. It was close to my name Talana. She and her mom would have matching names TCG and TJG. I thought that would be cute. Taylor and Talana had 6 letters in their names just like Lariat and Chance. How cool! Mother finally won. i loved that little girl!

You just never know!

The weekend was a blur. Sometimes it's the pits to have chemo on Friday. I slept all weekend. Seriously! I don't remember much of anything except waking up and going back to sleep. I so needed it though. It was a busy week in OK and MO for work. I ran myself ragged this past week and when I do that my body has a hard time catching up, so Friday night I hit the bed and Saturday and Sunday the bed and I were buds. I wasn't a very good mate. I'm so glad to have an understanding mate.

Good news! Chance, my youngest has a full time job starting in two weeks. Thank you God. The poor boy (man) has been working 3 part time jobs and really needed this break. He'll be working full time for the Weatherford Police Dept. Thank you God - you have been good to the Garrett family lately.

Today when I went out to move my car (we've been having major construction in the back where our covered parking is) my next door neighbor was out back, Nat Cohen and I began to talk. I've lived next door to him for 13 months and this is the most we've said to each other. Funny how it works. He and I really talked last year after he discovered I walked in the Komen walks. He sister is a breast cancer survivor and he had a daughter pass away from it! She lives in NYC I just found out. He lit up when I told him I had been to NY. He was raised there and the joy on his face when asking me what I had enjoyed and visited while there. He has two sons that live in Austin and San Antonio. I told him I worry when his papers pile up since I know his routine. Once when his brother-in-law passed away and Carlos(our maintenance man)actually broke into his place to check on him because his papers piled up for a week and they thought he had died in there. He wants to know when I participate in the next Komen walks. I found out that Mr. "blue pajamas" is 91 and still moving about. He's our other neighbor. I like living here. I still want to get rid of the upstairs neighbors. They are rude but it's okay - I'll make do.

Get to know your neighbors. You never know their stories. They may be someone with an interesting story. They could be someone that needs a friend or someone that could use a hello every once in a while. I always try and smile and make sure my neighbors know that I would be there to help them out. You just never know!

The Good Life!

I never know how to make people understand about cancer, my cancer. I don't act like I'm sick even when I'm feeling my worst, I don't like people to know. For years I never spoke about being sick, never, I just didn't feel the need that others needed to know. Now, every one seems to know or I forget that every one doesn't know and I make the mention that "chemo kills brain cells" and I feel really dumb that someone doesn't know that I have cancer. How do I do it - I don't know, the urge to not to want to be sick is one of them. I don't WANT to be ill. I want to feel good and I want to live and I want to be well. So, if I act like it and if I pretend that I am, well, just maybe I will be. Well there's hope isn't there and positive thinking can just about accomplish anything in my book.

This week a friend wanted my doctor's info for her sister in law. I think she got upset because my doctor, who only works in research wouldn't take the referral. I think what people don't understand is, because I do so many studies is I don't have "regular" doctors. When you are in studies, you have residents, rotating in and out, usually every 3 months sometimes you barely learn their names, you take whomever will cut on you , listen to you, see you strip, naked, radiate you. You are at their mercy pretty much. But I will do anything to stay alive and I feel like I'm doing it so others can live. I hope that one day these studies won't be needed but until then, I will volunteer for every one I can.

It has been a week of being in the Tulsa and Springfield, MO. I love my job! I love spending time with my clients. It feels good to be back on the road.

Life is good. I'm back in training for the two 60 mile walks I'm doing in Oct and Nov. I have to get the feet in shape. Who knows what DC is going to be like.

Hunter came to visit again on Sunday. He was super cute! I have to tell you - he walked me all over the neighborhood. We saw one of the bunnies that lives in the "hood". He was very calm and looked and me and said "bunny". We saw the big tractors in the back where they are repaving. We just went everywhere. He loves his T-Lee and I love him. He'll be visiting again in a couple of weeks.

I did an end user show for the Eskimo Joe group yesterday. It was great seeing Ken Thomason and Nancy Jolley. I love my buds. I don't know what I would do with out my friends. Seriously! I love them. We laugh so much! I think that is why I love my job so much! I have the Good Life!

Grey, Hunter, Scan's Results

This week! Well, let's see - I started off by searching for a new car. Oh dear was that an adventure. Not my favorite thing to do. It caused some arguments in the Garrett household. I knew what I wanted but didn't know if it would fit my budget. I had two great guys helping me but it's just never the same when you are going to be driving it. Last Friday I had actually driven a Ford Escape Limited I really liked at Park Cities Ford. It had all the bells and whistles and some I didn't need, but they seem to want to work with me on the price. They are Cowboy fans too there (a big perk in my book)! So, I went back on Monday to look and drive the car again. I left there on Monday with I want the car, let me see about the financing.

Tuesday, we had our local association's luncheon. Great day. Dave DeGreef spoke on the Advocacy Program and giving back to our industry. It's time for me to start giving back to this industry that has given so much to me. I also said that I would join the board. It's time.
I also said a big YES to the Ford Escape - yep I made a decision and picked up that baby that afternoon around 5:00. I was a little sad to see "Blue" go. We've experience a ton together. She had been with me 10 years. I bought her in April of 2000 when I joined Adva-Lite. She had been thru those 5 years and now my 5 years at Evans. It was time for a new vehicle. "Grey" has come home. She's a beauty! I owe a ton of thanks to Byron for all the help in assisting me with this. And the guys at Park Cities Ford here in Dallas. They were great, no pressure, just gentlemen. I'd recommend them to anyone, even my 71 year old mother.

Wednesday, I took my Anniversary Hire Date off and Chance and I went and picked up Little Man Hunter. Yep, we had a play date. We went to the Aquarium and he loved it. He got to feed the bird a blueberry and he saw the sharks. He had a HUGE time. He even said T-Lee when he didn't think anyone was paying attention. He was sitting in his car seat and we were headed down the road and all of a sudden he said "T-Lee". Chance and I both heard it. He was so good all day long. He came home and took a 2 hour nap. He got up and ate a huge lunch and he loves mandarin oranges. He watch a show with Uncle Chance and then he and I played and we wore our booots. He loves his boots. Chance took him home later that evening. I was worn out but so glad we did it.

Thursday, I had a day of appointments and nothing too exciting. Scans were yesterday evening. Today was chemo day! I did have one appointment today, which I normally never do and now I know why. I was so wiped out by the time I got home at noon that I barely made it to the sofa.

Now the good news from the scans. The radiation is killing the stupid tumor on my lung. It has shrunk from a ping pong/golf ball size down to a pebble size. The liver tumor has not grown. The bone cancer has not grown either. They are encouraged that the lung tumor has done so well with this radiation. This is the one that they just didn't think there was much hope for last year and here it is shrinking. Nanabooboo! Whacha gonna do now!!!
Anyway, just goes to show you - don't go giving death sentences. Well, that's my week in review. I can't think of anything else. It's a crazy life, but it's my life and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

God and His Angels

May I say how much I love home! Home is my healing place. This weekend the Lman is out of town and I have the whole place to myself and I've been chillin most of the day. I'm anxious for him to get back. I'm in the process of wanting to buy a new car and I need his help. I detest car shopping, if it weren't the need for a new one, I wouldn't do it. Do you buy a new or used? What brand? What's the best deal for the money? When you talk to one dealership, they try to convince you of theirs, you talk to another and theirs is better. I'd rather have alcohol dripped into the veins of my eyeballs than shop for a new car. And people wonder why I haven't purchased a new one in ten years. Here's the reason! Thank goodness my friend Byron has offered to help with this shopping thing too. He's an angel. And I need angels! God always puts angels right where I need them.

I have a lazy week planned. Hunter is coming on Wednesday for a T-Lee and Uncle Chance play date. I'm excited. I have a scan also this week. I have radiation 3 times this week and chemo. I keep waiting for the day, I turn the lights out and I glow. It is going to happen. I just know it! I don't ask for much, but if I could have a couple of prayers this week, a prayer for good news from the scans and finding the right vehicle for the right price. Not much!

Oh and maybe some patience with my upstair's neighbors. They have been hammering and tearing up carpeting and I guess laying new flooring for like the past 6 weeks. They love working late into the night and love getting up at 4:18 (no joke) in the AM. I'm on my last nerve with them. When I first moved in last year I never heard the guy, he gets a wife and like I said the past 6 weeks, it has been terrible. An older couple! Geez - I want to say, "human being lives below you, could you at least stop working about 8 and let me sleep". I'm a little cranky. Sorry - just venting. Thought I might feel better and I do or maybe it's the Valium kicking in. LOL!

Today, I celebrated an anniversary! 5 years ago today I joined Evans Manufacturing as a rep. Pretty good, I think. It was also 5 years at this time that I was cancer free. Wish I had that time back. It came roaring back that next spring in a routine scan. Wow, the things your brain will not forget. This I will not forget - the fight I still have left in me! Today when I was feeling a little down, I was reading some of the quotes and inspirational things people wrote to me. It still amazes me that I inspire. TJ Garrett inspires others. I just don't get it! But one couple wrote just about the same thing, that their wish for me was that I could speak to others about my positive attitude. That is my secret wish. I'd like to speak to those that are feeling down, that I would like to do. I'd also like to let high schoolers know that all actions have consequences but you can do things with your life.

Today as I was waiting to pick up some food, I met Alice. She's 70, sweet, her mother is 93 - March 9 is her birth date (she loves to play bingo and she still works at the church for 3 days a week - now this is the 93 year old Mother! - Pisces like myself -my birthday is March 7th as I told her). Miss Alice has grown children, been married, has a boyfriend of 33 years that she doesn't live with "Mr. Charlie", and she likes it like that. Any way, Miss Alice said that I reminded her of her mother, "not age wise, but smart and always wanted to read and keep busy". I guess me reading the paper waiting for my meal today. She said "you keep it up, my mother is 93 and still smart as a whip". I hope to live that long Miss Alice from Dallas, from the Palace as she told me. God as angels for me everywhere.